From the Sublime to the Ridiculous

Ladies and Gentlemen, my apologies for my absence in Blogland for the past few days. I expect you've been wondering where I've got to, since I'm normally lurking on here 24/7. My Staycation has been filled with doing Not A Lot. I've spent time on my sofa, wandering around the world of Oblivion, sleeping, eating and seeing people briefly. Yes, I really should have done this a few weeks ago. It's been overdue.

Earlier in the week, Boy's girlfriend's Mum (are you keeping up?) hailed me on FB and asked if I would like to go to the Voewood Literary Festival with her friend and work colleague (single), who won 2 tickets. None of his friends was up for it. I certainly was. We agreed that it wouldn't be a blind-date, fix-my-single-friends-up situation. So, off to Holt I went Saturday morning.

I had a blast. Somehow, I had all of my favourite things delivered in one day: literature, steam trains, the seaside, olives and live music. Mutual friend was brilliant company: witty, intelligent, generous. He didn't raise an eyebrow as I jumped up and down about steam trains. He was interested in the talks going on, he knew interesting people there.

I didn't know what to expect. I had a brief look at the programme and none of it stuck. I just rocked up with an open mind. It was great. I went to talks, drank coffee and soaked up the atmosphere at the gorgeous setting. People were wandering around and I kept thinking 'I should know you, you look like you're big in your field'.

Yesterday, I only went for the day sessions. It was like a Creative Writing reunion, two of my old tutors were there as well as the two stars of our course. What really surprised and moved me, was how warmly I was welcomed by all. I've been absent from that world for a good 18 months after my work with Unthank Books finished and I've not been doing anything creative since. Not only that, I sniffed out some freelance editing work through one of the talks I attended. One of the things which has come out of my time this week, is that I really need to be on firmer financial ground.

I love my job. I love the people I work with and I love working with words, even just writing copy. But I do need to be kept in the manner to which I have become accustomed. There are coffees and sparklies to buy. Fortunately, this does not lead to any heart-breaking decisions. I'm employed four days a week. I have at least another two to be filled. Therefore, doing the NLP professionally and going after creative writing opportunities makes complete sense. I am a woman who wants to have her cake and eat it. It is all possible, with a big enough bit of cake.

Yesterday afternoon, with a great deal of reluctance I left Voewood. The Great Ursus and his Lovely invited me to the cinema to see Conan the Barbarian. I've neglected them of late and going to the cinema with them is always good fun. It was originally to be the 3 of us, then Gee wanted to come along, her Number 2 Son rang me up and said he wanted to come. Boy decided he wanted to come out when he heard what was happening. So, we all bundled into my shiny car and off we went.

We go to the Hollywood Cinema in Anglia Square. The best that can be said about it is that it's a flea pit. However, the tickets are about half the price that the big shiny cinemas charge. The staff are friendly and are always up for a laugh and you don't need a small loan to buy popcorn and a drink.

Going to see a movie with the Great Ursus et all, is always an adventure. The Great Ursus has an odd sense of humour. While I cower at scary or gory bits, his great belly laugh echoes throughout. Not to mention the fact that we all have a very sarcastic movie critique-style. The more awful the film, the more fun we have with it.

Now Conan was never going to be Oscar material. I have fond memories of the original and Arnie, swinging his big sword around in the 80s. However, when one of the longest bits of dialogue Conan delivers is: I eat, I sleep, I slay. I am content. You know they didn't spend enough of the budget on script writers. We spotted the Lord of the Rings references, the orchestral score was diabolical and speaking of which, one scene had us all rolling around in the aisles laughing: the lurve scene. Well, actually, it was a scene not too far removed from a porn movie. It included bare breasts, different positions and a lot of thrusting. Some bright spark matched this with the most romantic and orchestral music which would have been more appropriate for a Chick-flick movie. Oh we how we laughed. There was gore, bare breated slave girls, limited plot and incest. Boy summed it up in one sentence: two men fighting over a girl. We all decided that it had been written by three, 15 year old boys. Given we're in the middle of an economic melt-down, I'm shocked this garbage got funding.

For this, I missed Adam Ant playing at Voewood. I tweeted about it late last night and this morning I was somewhat disconcerted to find @conanthemovie is now following me on twitter. I don't think he's going to be following me for long.

I'm still undecided as to whether I head out to Voewood this afternoon for the final night. My house is a pit, I have nothing to wear to work this week and my energy levels still aren't very good. I've got to be up bright and early tomorrow for my working week. I dread to think what I've got waiting for me. I think I'll put a couple of loads of laundry on, dig out my kitchen and see how I feel.


  1. Ja, I liked Arnold The Barbarian better, too. I did like the witch in this one. She seemed to be having a lot of fun with the role.

  2. lax ~ yes, the incestuous little minx certainly did seem to have the most fun. Mind you, she was the only one with any decent dialogue.

  3. I remember that cinema, then the Odeon, when it was new, back in the '60s. It was very impressive then, but those seats have never been renewed and times have moved on while it hasn't.

  4. Sounds like you enjoyed yourself at both Voewood and the movie - good for you! And good luck with the freelancing. Hope your return to work is not too unpleasant :)

  5. z ~ no, it certainly hasn't moved on, for which I am grateful.

    eggy ~ thanks hon. It's been a great time, it feels horribly Monday today (even though, it's obviously Tuesday).

  6. Who knew we both like stream trains?!

  7. Is "steam train" a euphemism?

  8. Conan? I have a distant memory *grunt* - and even this is "remade"? They must have serious problems in Hollywood nowadays.

  9. Sounds like the film version of Game of Thrones... this also features bare breasted women, incest and limited dialogue -- or maybe there's just a fashion for this going around?

  10. @ Macy: "bare breasted women" added for artistic merit!

  11. mj ~ in the zombie apocalypse they are the transport of the future.

    lax ~ not in this instance, though they do make me hot.

    mago ~ I made Boy watch the Arnie version last night, I never remembered it as being so good. It's brilliant.

    macy ~ I've heard Game of Thrones was a bit torrid. I haven't seen it.

    lax ~ bare-breasted women are to keep the blokes happy.

  12. The movie sounds a bit odd to say the least!
    I would much prefer some Adam Ant :o). Brilliant :o).

  13. Damn, in the end Arnie will become ART! Together with The Italian Stallion and vanDamme: The wholy trinity of knuckle fest!

  14. G*N*D ~ odd, perhaps isn't the best adjective to that works better.

    mago ~ it says a lot doesn't it? That a movie Arnie was in was actually good.


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