From Chickens to Gardening, via Bullocks

It's been a bit weird and crazy and nuts round here for a variety of reasons that will ensue further on. To bring you up to date as quickly as possible, I've decided to bullet things. 

Chickens

Polly wondering when Canasta would stop being such a dick

• Well, it's been a bit fun around here. Canasta decided to go broody and determinedly sat in the greenhouse outside my kitchen door.
• Broody hens are grumpy-as-fuck hens. 
• Polly thought it looked like fun and tried it out for a few days. But then she realised it was not very much fun at all and went back to normal.
• Jenga played fast and loose with two of Z's pullets to the point that they were escaping from her coop to go play with him.
• He became a very wilful cock and began refusing to come home at night. 
• I caught one of the hens trying to be broody and immediately popped her and Jenga in my coop.
• They were as happy as anything until Scrabble and Polly realised what was going on.
• I returned the little hen suitably chastened and kept Jenga in for a week or so.
• He has behaved since.
• Canasta eventually got bored sitting on a clay egg and is now back to normal.
• My little flock is happy again.

Canasta wondering why she can't be left alone

Cows

• Well, bullocks actually.
• While Z was away, a very nice man brought seven of them to over-summer on the Ups & Downs field.
• Which was fine, except bullocks aren't cows (yes, I know. I'll explain. Give me a minute).
• The cows last year were quite content to mooch around the field, eat grass and sunbathe.
• Not so these young lads.
• Within days they sabotaged their drinking tank and started playing with plastic pots stacked on the other side of the fence of the kitchen garden.
• They liked to play "It" with the cats and chickens. The chickens and cats didn't find it as much fun.
• The little buggers tried to eat the roof of the chicken coop with a mum and her youngsters. The tin with the chicken food was always covered with bullock spit every time I went to feed them.
• When Z got back she moved the coop, sorted out the water trough and generally got the youngsters to behave (because she brooks no shit from no one, no matter how much bigger they are)
• A couple of weeks ago, she came through slightly apologetic saying one of the bullocks escaped and was currently standing on the drive.
• It took three of us to get the damned thing back.
• It escaped again within 10 minutes of being put back.
• While we waited for the dairy farmer to send a man to fix the fence, as I sat there watching it, it tried three times to get out. Little bugger.
• Herding chickens was good practice for herding cattle. The only difference was the bullock was bigger and had more legs. Seriously. No difference. Attitude problems. 

Dave

• Pamela (who is totally lovely and awesome) sent Dave a pressie, all the way from Winnipeg, Canada. A blankie in his favourite colours.
• He loves it to bits and for days wouldn't even let Rummy share.
• The chemo is beginning to bite and Dave is getting more easily fatigued these days.
• Thankfully, we are nearly at mid-point. 

Cats

• When Z was away with LT (Lovely Tim, her SO if you don't visit her blog), I looked after the menagerie, including Eloise the cat.
• I've given up shutting the doors between our respective abodes.
• Eloise likes to come and visit. She says she comes around because there's never any food at hers. We know that's major fibs, but she's now got her own bowl here.
• She will come round and will greet Rummy with a nose sniff, closely followed by a thump and then there's Ball of Cats rolling around the floor.
• Rummy gives as good as he gets.
• They chase each other around the garden like mad things.
• Rummy will often go visit Z and LT in the evenings.
• It's very sociable around here.

Chickens

• After Canasta stopped being broody, Scrabble decided she didn't want to lay in the greenhouse anymore.
• I knew she was laying away, but hadn't got it together enough to follow her.
• Dave found she was laying in some nettles (always the bloody nettles) on the other side of my fence.
• That was fine. I took the eggs away and put one of the clay eggs there, so she'd keep laying in the same place.
• Unfortunately, I forgot to tell Z's gardener not to mow over that spot.
• When Scrabble discovered she couldn't lay in secret there anymore she was very put out.
• She spent the afternoon looking for places to lay.
• Dave and I were having a cup of tea at the dinning table when we glanced up and there she stood in the living room, on my carpet. She'd come in through the front door.
• As gently as possible I shooed her out (I didn't want her to crap on the floor in protest).
• A little while later on, I come up to Dave who is still sitting at the table. "There's a chicken on the kitchen counter," he says. I look and see my chicken mug on the kitchen counter. "OMG the chemo has rotted your brain," says I in my usual caring fashion (call me Florence). "No, not the chicken mug" he says slightly annoyed. "Chicken on the counter!" There's a little burble, I go to investigate and sure enough, there's Scrabble.
• Z pointed out I could have got a large pan out for her. It would have been efficient. 
• This is why I love Z so much.

Art

• I'm painting again. It's brilliant (no, not my painting - that sucks) being able to be creative again.
• I am now okay with the fact that it will take many years for me to suck less at my art. 
• Dave bought me a proper painter's smock to go over my clothes. He doesn't want me to use his jumpers any more. Fair enough.
• I realised that the sketching easel I was using wasn't robust enough. Dave brought me a studio easel as a birthday present (because he is awesome).
• The great thing about working with oil paints is I can put down my palette (okay, plastic plate) and brush and walk off when I've had enough. It also means I can pick them up again just as easily. 
• Dave came through and saw me painting in my onesie, covered by the smock. He thought it was really funny (I don't see it myself. He has a strange sense of humour). 

The Meaning of Life

• I am pursuing my training in Core Process Psychotherapy.
• I went down to Devon for the first in two weekends of foundation training.
• It was bloody brilliant.
• So much so, I've applied to do the MA.
• I will need to complete the foundation training and attend an interview.
• Please keep everything crossed that the Powers that Be look upon my application favourably.
• It will be a few weeks before I know (I have to have the interview before they offer me a place).
• It will be a huge commitment in time and money, but one that will be worth it.

Gardening

• It seems this is the week of British summer. 
• I've already carted three barrow-fuls of nettles and other weeds out of my garden and it doesn't look any different. 
• At least my work of last autumn was worth it. The nettles are coming out a lot easier this time round. 
• It also helps that my beloved bought for me a pair of leather gauntlets that the nettles can't sting though to get my hands and wrists. 
• Unfortunately, I still got stung on my legs as I moved a bundle of the damned weeds around my body. Bastards. 

Apart from my still ranting about the state of hospital parking, we are still here, breathing in and out regularly and happily. Much love darlings.

Randomness

Sometimes stringing thoughts together and following them through is asking a bit much and as it's still early this bright Monday morning, today I blog in bullet points.

• I am holding the fort while Z is canalling in Wales, this means the menagerie are my responsibility. This means chasing the velociraptors around the cows
• In order to better chase the velociraptors around the field with the cows, Dave bought me a thumb stick. I look like a proper fake country person now
• The velociraptors like bananas, but not cabbage 2 days in a row
• They don't appreciate my fumbling under them for eggs.

• It's Spring here
• Last week, I found myself going through my wardrobe and removed 3 bags of clothes
• Over the weekend, I found myself going through my chest of drawers and removed all the old pants, tights, socks and vests that I never wear
• Last Monday, I had no intention of doing any of that. I still have one more section to sort out. I'm not ruling out the possibility it'll happen today. Or not
• Dave and I re-arranged my place for the Summer. The fireplace has been cleaned within an inch of its life, I dusted and hoovered
• My desk is now back in the study part of my bedroom
• Where it was in my front room, is now my art area.

• I also sorted through my herbs and spice cuboard
• It was well overdue, there were two packets of ground cinnamon, both out of date
• I go to an ethnic supermarket in Norwich and buy everything about half the price of mainstream shops, for more of the product and chances are it's far more fresh
• I finally got around to labelling my jars. Something that makes Dave very happy
• Apparently, it's been a source of frustration. I think there are times when he's not very adventurous
• I thought that having 4 different types of oils and vinegars was a bit hipster
• That was until I chatted to La Diva Cucina on Facebook
• It seems I have a way to go yet.

• A walk into town on Thursday made my knee grumble to an extent I started limping
• It has been grumbling off and on before I went back to the gym, I thought strengthening it up would sort it out. It hasn't
• I went to my osteopath who turned it this way and that, stretched everything out and got my back to make the noise
• It's a tendon injury, not cartilage
• This is good news
• The bad news is, I mustn't load it. No deadlifts, no squats and I am to do exercises to strengthen the patella. He also suggested sports massage
• Sports massage, for the uninitiated, is not the gentle stroking with candles, incense and whale song playing as you sigh with pleasure
• If you're not crying during sports massage, they aren't doing it right
• I'm not looking forward to it
• However, I want to deadlift sooner rather than later.

• My work-out appetite hit me last week
• Now, if I need to eat - I need to eat NOW
• No more waiting until lunchtime for the first meal of the day
• I've also noticed my portion sizes have increased as well
• As long as I keep working out as hard as I have been, I should continue building muscle mass, rather than fat
• It's quite nice being able to eat without evaluating every calorie.

• I went into Norwich last week. Twice
• My friends who live in Norwich are good people and I love them dearly
• But Norwich has turned into a festering pustule
• There are more Big Issue sellers than there are corners for them
• The sign indicating the Food Bank drop off point, took me by surprise
• Shops I was expecting to go to, have shut
• The levels of aggression of people walking around the city centre at lunchtime, was breath-taking
• The trickle down effect of the economic recovery doesn't seem to have reached the Norfolk capital
• I remember twenty years ago, I would walk around the city at 3 am if I couldn't sleep (when Boy wasn't with me obvs)
• I don't much like how the city has grown up. Part of the Plan was to move back into the city after Z moves on from here
• That part of the Plan has now been crossed off.

• When I was in Norwich having my teeth cleaned, Rummy had his butt seriously kicked
• Sadly, it has knocked his confidence considerably and he is very hesitant about going out
• It didn't stop him squaring off with Benji the dog
• If I get hold of the bloody cat, it's going to discover what a real arse kicking looks like.

• Problem with my plotting became clear as I tried to explain it to Julia (who must be worshipped) 
• I will get the issue resolved this week, but won't begin writing until next week
• This week, with the fort holding and the fact I am going to visit Boy in Lincoln, means my week has become fragmented
• I am visiting, shopping, velociraptor chasing, cooking and being generally creative in the intervening period
• Next week, I write.

July 2014 - an update

If you've been keeping up with my lack of shenanigans on Facebook, you'll know the last month has been a bit of a trial for me. Got side-swiped by a virus, that behaved like a weird stalker ex-boyfriend by refusing to go away; the lack of movement during this time has buggered both my back and wrist. 

In other words, any blog post I might write starts "whinge, whine, moan..." 

Therefore, I fall back on blogging with bullet points:

• Dave's coffee business is now up and running
• It is a lot of fun
• The equipment is really heavy (coffee machine alone is 65kg)
• The coffee is really good
• I'm the cashier/order taker and I wipe up mess every 3 seconds which drives the barista absolutely nuts, but keeps everything clean
• It's bloody hard work
• I really hope my gym membership is tax deductible, because if I am to continue working with him in this business, I must become much, much stronger.

• It is the season of weddings
• We were doing coffee at a wedding yesterday and it was fab
• Boy and I will go off in a couple of weeks to celebrate The Viking and his lovely's wedding
• I am really looking forward to it
• I know they will continue to be a very happy couple and be very good for each other.

• Rummy is totally bonkers
• Boy continues to claim Rummy is a dick
• He rushes outside to break up the many fights Rummy has with his doppelgänger neighbour, Rocky
• Boy is still pleased when Rummy comes to sit next to him
• In the morning, after I given him breakfast and made myself a cup of coffee, Rummy comes to sit on my lap until he gets too hot.

• I miss running and I miss the gym
• I miss that feeling of accomplishment after a workout or a run, even if it wasn't the best
• I'm going down to the gym this morning to book myself into some yoga sessions to try and free up my back
• It's nuts how much ground I have lost in such a few weeks
• My body has made it very clear it needs to move
• Finding the balance will be the challenge from here on in
• Finding the balance is always a challenge for a person who naturally enjoys extremes.

• Summer should be my best time of year, given I love warm weather
• With my hayfever, sinusitis and increased vulnerability to bugs at this time of year, I now perceive Autumn and Winter completely differently
• I was much healthier last Winter, despite the cold and the bugs flying around the office
• I will be doing a lot of research into allergies and sinusitis for next year
• The Lovely Ursus gave me a light bulb moment when she reminded me this is my tough time.

• I suspect I have become vain in my old age
• Urban Decay make up is now my drug of choice
• I had several oops moments in their counter
• I have now more eye shadows than Pantone have colours
• Some are sparkly, some shimmery and some are barely there
• I haven't decided on a "look" yet, it's all down to mood right now
• In fact, it's all down to mood. I'm sure there's a deeper meaning to my current obsession, I don't much care to think too deeply about it
• Eyebrows continue to be the bane of my existence
• However, I'm beginning to get the hang of them
• I no longer look continually cross or surprised (unless I'm cross or surprised), which I'm counting as progress.

• My finances are challenging
• Thanks to new government regulations, I am unable to consolidate my debt to a cheaper monthly payment
• I have way too much fun with cash
• I tell myself, this is a learning experience
• When I finally clear my debt, I won't be so quick with my credit card
• That was until Friday when I went to the Urban Decay counter
• It's time for me to think outside my financial box.

• I'm in my fourth decade and I haven't begun another degree
• It worries me
• I did my BA in Development Studies in my 20s
• I did my BA in Creative Writing in my 30s
• My 40s stretch in front of me and I'm not sure what to learn next
• Not that I can afford another degree
• But I am beginning to think about it.

Considering I didn't know what to write, I think I've done quite well...

That's all for now folks. Catch you later...

Still Rambling

Still too early damn it

As you can see, there's some improvement. The days of doing bugger-all are beginning to work. But my attention span is still all over the place, so I'm falling back on lazy blogging  with bullet points.

• Dave made the mistake. He told me he saw a purple lava lamp. I needed it. Yes, this is exactly all what is wrong in society today. I needed it. I had to have it. It went on my credit card. I don't care. I LOVE IT! It's mine...
• It now sits next to my printer, behind my laptop 
• It takes a while for the wax to warm up and then it makes lovely shapes in the liquid
• I gave my beloved a torc wrench for Christmas, he gave me a heart rate and fitness monitor (purple). We are both ecstatic with our gifts. Needless to say, I know it won't be long before every nut and bolt on our bikes will be tightened up...and apparently, I have a [good] fitness level
• I'm starting to move again. Only after Dave complained of a sore throat and thick head for a week, it occurred to me that perhaps another bug was contributing to my general malaise
• Work has been a veritable cornucopia of germs, bugs and things to make you go bleugh
• I must get more anti-bac gel to give my immune system a break. I'm fed up of feeling ill
• Boy's back in town. It's a lot more strange having him back, than I anticipated. Though I hasten to add, it is good to see him
• I realised we don't talk much when we're alone together, we just kind of hang out
• I wonder if he thinks I'm boring and I don't do much. I certainly haven't done much over the break
• I've been drinking a lot of tea over the break. It makes me feel warm and cosy inside
• My man bought me a tea pot to match my kitchen and it has a removable metal basket inside for loose tea. You see why I'm so partial to him? It matches my kitchen
• The Boxing Day sale madness has passed me by. I have not participated in the feeding frenzy that is seasonal bargain hunting. Apart from the purple lava lamp (did I mention it was purple), I've been unmoved to venture into the city
• When we did amble into the city so I could purchase the lava lamp (purple), I was the only person in a frenzy. However, for the first time in years there were masses of shoppers who were actually carrying bags
• I feel your confusion
• In recent years, the city has been busy at this time of year. Gentleman's Walk, the main thoroughfare of the retail heart of Norwich, has been packed. But people were looking, not buying. Their arms were swinging
• Not so this year. People had bags and bags. This is good news for our local economy. These four festive weeks are when our retailers take 80% of their money
• Apart from one Amazon purchase to go abroad, once again I shopped local and independent. I was thinking of stretching my definition to John Lewis (which is a co-operative, but a large one), and in the end I didn't need to
• I did go into a local shop and ask them to get me an electrical item. I was unimpressed when they invited me to go to John Lewis as they could not match their price to order in this bit of kit. I told them it didn't matter. I wanted to give them my money. They declined
• Today will be the last totally lazy, bone idle day of rest. From tomorrow, I will start increasing my activity levels and start bringing my sleeping patterns back to normal i.e. not going to sleep at 1 am, getting up at 9-10-11 am
• I am so behind in my personal admin I'm looking at my colon. If it doesn't get done this week, the tax man is going to be demanding my lava lamp
• Even though I had exactly the Christmas I wanted and needed, I still had The Sad. I miss my dad and I'm homesick. My family back home and I have missed each other communication-wise and in a way I'm relieved. The way I feel right now, I could just hop on a plane and head out there now
• It's a dangerous feeling. 

It's purple

Blogging Update By Bullet Points

• I have bloggers block
• I've been very busy at work
• Had a very busy social life over the last couple of weekends
• Went to No Strings Cabaret and Burlesque night last weekend
• Burlesque is heaps of fun; risque rather than raunchy
• Corsets are impossible to put on without assistance
• They really do heave everything in and up!
• It won't take much pursuading to put it on again, though apparently, I need it in a smaller size!
• I definitely will get a different skirt. Not so much skirt as frilly belt
• And no, there are no pictures. Don't even ask.
• I've been suffering from Domestic Urges
• Last weekend, I had a hankering to make a Roast Chicken
• I am out of practice. My timings were all wrong with the roasties
• It still tasted good
• Since then I have cooked *and* done dishes
• My laundry is out of control, the floordrobe currently rules
• I don't care
• It's a good thing I don't share my bedroom with anyone else.
• My Boy is now 18 years old
• He is now the responsible adult in the house
• He enjoys being carded now
• He is enjoying going out for legal drinks with his mates
• He now has part of his tattoo done
• It is quite spectacular and we can't wait until January when it gets finished
• Funny, how it just looks so right on him
• He's proud of it and himself, I'm proud of him too
• I've been watching loads of groovy dvds
• They include: Harold and Maude, Moon, Touch of Zen and last night there was Men Who Stare at Goats
• Tomorrow night, I'm off to the cinema to see Puss in Boots
• You can tell I'm so High Brow in my entertainment, can't you?
• Since seeing Nobodaddy, I've been in a Bluegrass frame of mind
• Gillian Welch has been on repeat
• This has not been helped by the awesome gig last night
• Brooks Williams is truly awesome
• iTunes has been having quite a bit of business from me lately
• More worrying than the Domestic Urges is the fact I'm looking forward to Christmas
• Boy says he will be with me which means...duhn, duhn, DUHN....Drunken Duck
• Yes, Ladies and Gentlemen, it will be Xmas pjs, naughtiness, dvds and drunken cookery
• I've been serious about buy presents from local/independent shops
• Even if it has meant me going into the City on a Saturday
• It has required me being more thoughtful, but the effort is worthwhile.
• My favourite eating/drinking place on Unthank Road, 103 has gone bust
• I am well pissed off
• It was the only place in walkable distance where I could have a meal for one, without being the sad weird woman, desperate to pick up
• It worries me how many shops are going under
• I worry for next year, I seriously do
• The World is Going to Hell in a Handbasket.
• I am looking forward to my works' dos
• Yes, you read that right, in the plural
• Friday, is the sit down, posh do for my current employment
• Monday, is the sit down, poshish do for my previous employment
• The following Friday is the not-so-posh eat and drink afternoon/evening out for current employment
• I have an awesome dress for the posh do, really looking forward to wearing it.
• Hanging around people who are passionate about the coffee and tea they drink, is contagious
• Had lunch with my ex-Course Leader today
• First cup of coffee was machine made (yes, I could really tell)
• The second cup of coffee in a different establishment had me frowning
• It tasted like it would have been good, but something had gone wrong along the line
• Round, robust flavour, but bitter, bitter aftertaste, like they'd scraped the burnt off toast
• I now have 3 different types of coffee to choose from in the morning
• Am considering buying a stove-top coffee maker.
• Speaking of things I'm considering buying...
• Miller Harris have a new fragrance out
• It is to die for
• It's called La Fumee and it's just like incense made perfume
• *drools*
• I will wait until after Xmas and the January credit card before I go nuts
• I may end up having a perfume saving pot
• But it is just, just fantastic
• Considering I've had bloggers' block, I've done quite well.