Wednesday, April 22, 2009

What Plan?

It's funny really. I know exactly what to do in a crisis, I can problem solve for other people in a heartbeat, I can get on the phone and give Richard Branson shit for not sorting out my wretched box, or blast a solicitor for giving me 24 hours notice to transfer money across into their holding account. I'm just not very sure what to do when things are turning out well.

Life is so much easier, if you've got a Plan that goes tits up, or even occaisionally a Plan that goes right (though I've not had much experience of that one). I'm now sitting here with a vague sense of unease that something is about to go completely pear-shaped and I should be addressing it immediately. But I just can't figure out why. Yes, I'm procrastinating shouting at the tax people and I still haven't looked for my metres or sorted out my TV License...but these are balls which I know are sitting at my feet.

I suspect I'm just not used to things working out well for me. My job is going well. I met a friend who I haven't seen in years and we were talking about work and study and my house move and she laughed and said 'ah you're a grown-up now'. And I realised she's right. These are grown-up decisions I've been making. I want a stable and comfortable home for Boy, the Cat and me. I want regular employment, I want a car that gets me from A to B in a reliable, but fun way. In the last 6 months I have come to value paying bills on time, buying food without thinking 'how much?'. There is much to be said for going shopping without the guilt for the Indulgencies. I am getting used to this.

Does this mean I'm becoming 'normal'? This is slightly worrying for me. I mean I'm paying a mortgage, living in a semi, driving a BMW, earning an honest living. Am I turning into someone I never wanted to be? Am I turning into a suburban, net-curtain twitching, repressed woman?

Dunno. Only time will tell. Perhaps this blog will soon be filled with the mis-adventures of shopping in John Lewis? I hope not.

4 comments:

  1. There's nothing wrong with shopping in John Lewis. The good makeup is there, in some branches at least!

    I think it sounds like you're becoming a grown up and its fantastic that things are going well.

    I do know what you mean though and on some level I think you're better off if you can cope in a crisis because there's always one round the corner..just waiting for you to get comfortable!

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  2. beth ~ thanx for the vote of confidence honey. It's much appreciated. x

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  3. Hon, I really don't think you have a thing to worry about, you have to many mad friends around you to let you get two feet firmly on the ground for very long.
    I solemly promise i will keep you on your toes and away from the net curtains.
    XXX

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  4. britswitch ~ you're just so fabulous! Lead me astray baby!

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