Toxic Soup

A few weeks ago I told you I abandoned my desire to be a more eco-friendly gardener for slug pellets, weedkiller and weed'n'feed. The day after I put down the slug pellets, there were tiny invertibrate corpses rotting on my garden beds. I have been trying very hard not to feel guilty about it, but frankly, there were a helluva lot of dead snails and slugs. No wonder they were reducing my pride and joys to mere sticks. I haven't put any more down. Truthfully, as much as I did rejoice to see the murder and mayhem around me, I'm loathe to decrease their numbers further. After all, what will the toads and frogs eat?

The pond area looks fab. The pond itself has definitely benefitted from the clean-up and new plants. It's so clear, I can actually see the bottom. The frogs are still unimpressed, despite my getting them some more cover, in the shape of a floating plant and varigated mint. Ungrateful bastards, the lot of them. There wasn't even a Prince Charming in that lot. Let me tell you, frogs are cold on the lips this time of year.

My lawn, instead of being many shades of green, thanks to the 5 or 6 different species of grass and moss, is now a patchwork of green grass, bare earth and dead brown moss. I'm scratching my head here people. How is this supposed to be an improvement? I suppose, if I feel energetic at some point, I should rake it. Would you care to put money on the likelihood of that happening?

I went to see my IFA (Independent Financial Advisor, otherwise known as Wednesday to Friday Boss). It was slightly harrowing. He was obviously feeling a bit paternal. I got a lecture. He stopped short of waving a large pair of scissors and demanding my credit card.  I got the picture. No more retail therapy. No more buying house plants. No more Nottcutts.

*sigh*

Yes, I did promise I'll try to behave.