Life, The Universe, Everything...

Hey people. Did you realise we're half way through 2011? Did you realise we're half way through the half-way through point?

So how goes it with those resolutions? Remember them? We made them at the start of this year. January 2011? Got really drunk? Wrote loads of shit? Ring any bells? No? Well, I remembered mine. Stop thinking about it - do it!

As a quick re-cap...this is what I stopped thinking about:

I stopped thinking about quitting smoking. I quit. I realised today, it's been two months. How about that people? I did it. Took a couple of goes. Every time I stopped, I hated going back to it a little bit more. I don't like being addicted. It doesn't suit my little rebellious self. I don't like being told what to do, even by drugs. Do I miss it? Actually, the only thing I really miss, is the 5 min breaks every now and then. I miss standing out in my garden several times a day. I feel silly doing it without something to do.

I stopped thinking about the fact that I ought to do something about earning more money. I'm incredibly lucky in that my work was able to make the space for me to do more days. I've so enjoyed working 4 days a week in one place, I've been able to get a sense of my own space there, my own responsibilities. It's been awesome.

I stopped thinking I should really get off my butt and exercise. I'm not going to lie, I'm struggling with this. I'm swimming regularly again and that's been great. In fact, I can't get away from the very unpleasant truth: I feel so much better when I exercise. Going swimming regularly really has brought this home. So, I shall keep doing it and find more physical things to do. Any ideas? (the person who mentions Zumba, will have to die).

I stopped thinking about the fact that I want to learn NLP. Yep, I can tick that off my list. I've now got my NLP Practitioner's Certificate. I just need some volunteers to work my magic on. Come on, line up people! As with all things, my certificate is merely the beginning of my journey. I have much, much more to learn and experience.

The single, biggest change that's happened to me in 2011, is the change in my internal landscape. I have taken the very excruciating lessons of the last couple of years and I have learnt from them. Not only that, I apply these lessons to my Life, every day.

Every day I wake up now, grateful for the Life I lead. I am so blessed, so lucky, sometimes it's almost a painful sensation. I have friends who love me, in real life and on-line. I have people around me who genuinely give a fuck and give me their most precious possession - their time.

I've learnt, the very hard way, that Life can irrevocably change in between one breath and the next. Therefore, these moments where I find joy, I revel in them. I take every opportunity to laugh, to hug, to be supportive, to love.

When I think of the time I've spent being negative, being depressed, resentful and disappointed. Wasted time. Time I will never get back again. It's lost. Gone. Forever. I can't do anything about it, but I can do something about this moment.

It's funny, but the change in my attitude has made my life so much more vibrant, more intense. Boy says I seem moody occasionally and he's probably right. The things I feel are more intense because they aren't filtered or buffered by protective layers of shite. I'm learning to risk being myself in the World, really being myself. The Editor in my Head took a road trip and hasn't been seen since.

I'm going to leave you with something I learnt from NLP which sums things up nicely: it's not failure if you're keeping on keeping on. So I'm keeping on with the exercise. I'm keeping on with learning new things at work and in my personal life. I'm keeping on being happy.