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Showing posts from June, 2011

I Will Survive

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I was somewhat shocked, not to mention horrified, to learn this evening that my favourite Danish Pastry did not know the words to Gloria Gaynor's anthem for all of those with broken hearts: I Will Survive. Therefore, to ensure this sad state of affairs is sorted out, here they are.

Now sing!

At first I was afraid, I was petrified


Kept thinking I could never live, without you by my side

But I spent so many nights, thinking how you did me wrong

I grew strong, I learned how to carry on

and so you're back

from outer space

I just walked in to find you here

with that sad look upon your face

I should have changed my stupid lock

I should have made you leave your key

If I had known for just one second

you'd be back to bother me



Go on now go walk out the door

just turn around now

'cause you're not welcome anymore

weren't you the one who tried to break me with goodbye

you think I'd crumble

you think I'd lay down and die

Oh no, not I

I will survive

as long as I know …

Wear Sunscreen

I am the Class of '99. I thought at the time this was a fairly groovy tune. I've printed this out and stuck it around me, to remind myself of the important things. So, in my usual fashion, I thought I'd share.

Ladies and Gentlemen of the Class of ’99: wear sunscreen.



If I could offer you only one tip for the future, sunscreen would be it. The long term benefits of sunscreen have been proved by scientists whereas the rest of my advice has no basis more reliable than my own meandering experience. I will dispense this advice now:


Enjoy the power and beauty of your youth. Oh never mind; you will not understand the power and beauty of your youth until they have faded. But trust me, in 20 years you’ll look back at photos of yourself and recall in a way you can’t grasp now, how much possibility lay before you and how fabulous you really looked. You are not as fat as you imagine.


Don’t worry about the future. Or worry, but know that worrying is as effective as trying to solve an alg…

Pedantry

I've been thinking about something Intuitive Eggplant said in the comments section of my last post. It resonates with me partly because on my Creative Writing degree, where in poetry exercises, it has been known for me to take 12 hours to chose a word to go in a line I was writing and partly due to the NLP, whereby words gain a literal power.

Consider the differences between:
quitgive upstopNow, I don't know about you, but I hate quitting anything. Be it the most appalling relationship, friendship, or situation. I like to think of myself as a person who sees things through to the absolute, most bitter end. This has been particularly true of me in appalling relationships. In the past, I have found it nigh on impossible to walk away until the Fat Lady had sung, done an encore, had her after-show party, done two kilos of drugs with the two young men she met at the party, collapsed after the orgy, paramedics rescusitated her, she's recovered in hospital and she's in rehab. (…

Life, The Universe, Everything...

Hey people. Did you realise we're half way through 2011? Did you realise we're half way through the half-way through point?

So how goes it with those resolutions? Remember them? We made them at the start of this year. January 2011? Got really drunk? Wrote loads of shit? Ring any bells? No? Well, I remembered mine. Stop thinking about it - do it!

As a quick re-cap...this is what I stopped thinking about:

I stopped thinking about quitting smoking. I quit. I realised today, it's been two months. How about that people? I did it. Took a couple of goes. Every time I stopped, I hated going back to it a little bit more. I don't like being addicted. It doesn't suit my little rebellious self. I don't like being told what to do, even by drugs. Do I miss it? Actually, the only thing I really miss, is the 5 min breaks every now and then. I miss standing out in my garden several times a day. I feel silly doing it without something to do.

I stopped thinking about the fact that …

Sunday Playlist

Normally, my Sundays progress along the Commodores' song. But no, not today. Today my Sunday kicked off with this track and it's all gone downhill from there.

This is my subtle Sunday playlist:
Jump Around- House of Pain
Lovestoned - Justin Timberlake
Born Slippy - Underworld
Gravel Pit - Wu Tang Clan
Mundian to bach ke - Panjabi MC
Gonna Make you Sweat (everybody dance now) - C & C Music Factory

Ah yes, music to make me shake ma booteh!

However, loud and outrageous you might think that list might be for a Sunday morning. My Boy and his GF are currently at Download, the awesome rock festival. They've been camping there since Wednesday and the brief text exchanges suggest they are having the most awesome time 'EVER'. Camping, being dirty, watching the hungover stumble around, campsite banter and their most favouritist bands playing in the Whole Wide World. I think it's safe to say, they're having a good time.